Thursday, January 24, 2013

If it's so bad why can't I walk away

I really need to be more diligent with this blog so I don't feel like all the days are dying in my head.

January 17, 2013
I know I shouldn't have but I did. I called Justin and we went to dinner at this restaurant near the mall called Eggs and Things. It serves breakfast all day! Things were going about as well as things go for us. It was a pleasant enough meal until Jon started texting me at the end of dinner. I go to answer him and Justin gets pissed. It's not like he wasn't texting someone while we were chilling together. Yes, I know it's rude, but sometimes there are things that need to be answered. I drive him home and he's super upset that I'm texting someone new and that I won't tell him. I think it doesn't matter because I'm in the moment and he tries to justify it by saying that I'm trying to get with someone. I hate the fact that he's mad and can't really explain why. Stressed and annoyed I can't deal. I call Ty and ask him for advice and he gives me some good advice aside from the fact that I'm still talking to him. I also call Sugi to ask him for advice and he gives me some also sound advice. I guess that settles it. Did I mention that Jon also got pissed over text that we hadn't hung out yet? We hadn't even met in person and he's already being over dramatic I'm getting so over it.

January 18, 2013
I get a call at 3 in the morning from Justin saying please come lay with me and I'm sorry for being such a prick and the only reason I'm jealous is because I'm small. I drove out to him and the door is locked and I knock on both doors and call him a bunch of times. Irritated I drive home and get caught speeding, but thankfully the cop buys my story about coming from work and tells me not to speed on the way home. Get up later that day to drive to work and call Justin to ask what's up. He answers and says that he feels like shit for not answering the door and that I should have tried harder to wake him up...i don't know about that. I tell him that there's a Miyazaki film being shown at work that night and that's where I'll be. He apologizes again and tells me that he'll try and make it. I figure he'll bail like he always does, so it falls into the if he comes he comes, if he doesn't he doesn't. I work through the day and then cut pineapple for that night. Dang, I lost my skills for cutting pineapple perhaps I need to go visit Dole Plantation and get a refresher course. While, I'm cutting pineapple my phone starts ringing because Justin calls. I call him back and he actually says that he's actually coming but he'll be late. If he comes he comes. Brandi comes after class and we sit in my office for a hot second and I tell her about my almost speeding ticket before my boss demands that we be social with the special guests that come that night. We go and be social and then the mixer starts. Troy comes to the event too and I'm a bit surprised he showed after the incident at STIR. We don't talk much during the event, but he told my boss and some other people that he was here because a friend invited him. Justin actually showed up and was apologetic about earlier today as well as coming late. He then proceeds to talk to people which I'm happy to see that he's being social and keeping in touch with people since he hasn't been around. I sit  by Brandi and we're chatting for a bit while she colors. I grab food and sit back down and the Justin comes and sits by me and Troy ends up sitting across the room. Watch the film I doze for a bit and there's birthday cake for 2 people in the room and trivia questions. Then I'm cleaning up and people offer to help, while my boss talks about the movie a bit. I'm washing dishes and Justin's offers to bag the leftovers on the table. As usual Troy can't just jump in, but needs to be told where to help. Everyone cleans up and then Troy leaves and I say bye. I offer Brandi a ride home and Justin asks for a ride as well. It's a pretty silent short ride to the dorms and there Justin jumps in the front seat. As we're leaving he starts asking me about Troy. Seriously, boy?!? Why does it matter? We hook up because that's how it goes and we're lying there for half a second before his roommate walks in the door and then it's bye. His roommates know but are decent enough not to say anything....they have their own drama.

January 19, 2013
Since I got home pretty late and was gonna try and sleep in, but Brandi and I promised to meet up and go to Dave & Busters in the afternoonish. I pick her up when Jon texts demanding that we hang out that night which I'm okay with until he can't make definite plans. Brandi and I hang at Dave & Busters and win a bunch of tickets but don't take anything home. We go for Menchie's after and we talk about Troy, Justin, Jon, and Sean. It was a weird day. Go by the mall walk around check on Justin but don't let him see him. Don't get anything at the mall which is good. Go home watch a ton of Netflix and then pass out, but not before Justin calls me and we chat for a bit before I go back to sleep.

January 20, 2013
Get up early and head to Mililani for a car wash. Go to church and then wash cars where I get soaking wet and feel almost like a waste of time because we didn't advertise well and only made $300. Go to McDonald's with the crew for lunch and then go to try find frozen raspberries for smoothies. Walk into 2 stores before buying things and while I'm there Justin calls and we chat for a bit. Get home pass out for a bit before Wendy calls and tells me to come out to Dave & Buster's because its her friend's gf birthday. I decide to go out because I'm off the next day and could use a chill night out. Takes forever to get there cause there's an accident. Finally get there and find them order food. It's a chill night although I do tell Wendy what happened on Friday. Boys causing drama is no bueno. Wendy's friend Brian is cute but that's not going to happen. The Kahai character is also cute, but apparently he's in a long distance relationship. Hang out win tickets cash in, but don't walk out with a prize. Call Justin and he doesn't answer for a bit. Intend on going home, but then he calls and we attempt to meet up but playing let's find Justin and then hookup. Another one of those nights where we're lying there for half a second before his roommate walks in again. It's not weird.

January 21, 2013
Meet up with Wendy cause her roommate is leaving the island after living for a couple of months (military), so we do a circle island tour starting near her house at the Byodo-In temple. Stop in Waipio for gas take forever in Wahiawa and finally end up in Haleiwa. We visit a few shops in town and then head toward the shrimp trucks. We end up eating at Fumis cause the line was short, but Wendy still likes Romys better. We end up rushing back to the house because Wendy get a text from her brother saying that the convection oven she's been eyeing for a while. It was a quick ride and we're back at her place. We watch about 10 minutes of MI: Ghost Protocol and then she's off to drop her roommate off at the airport and then to dinner. I'm headed home to relax and finish MI. It's going to be a wild week at work.

January 22, 2013
Yes, it's a going to be a wild week at work. There's a camp meeting and I remember taping with Wayde but I honestly don't remember much else about the day except that Justin called a bunch toward the end of the meeting and said that he was headed home to sleep. Oh and we grabbed lunch at this chicken katsu place in Shirokiya and it tasted like crap.

January 23, 2013
Yesterday was pretty chill but busy. There was a strategic planning meeting with Glenn and then working on stuff and planning on Cleanup for Sunday. Can't believe that's its already Xgames weekend. Have a long trip at Costco and call Justin to chat later. After Costco and picking up things at kmart I'm working on a haul for youtube. Have dinner with the 'rents and then try to relax. I finally call Justin and ask to come over in the morning.

January 24, 2013
Woke up drove to Justin's and it was okay for a bit. Then there was drama and let's just say I really shouldn't talk about it. It's bad, so bad. I get to work and try to focus , but can't really. End up going to see Justin during my lunch and try to apologize and it doesn't work out so well. Still mad and he decided that we shouldn't do anything anymore. We'll see how it goes, but right now we're not speaking. I comfort Brandi through a tough time and is having a chill night. My mom still decides to express her opinion on my love no just no.

I'll try and write more tomorrow...

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